There is no one objective reality...there are many "realities." Everyones reality is so different, both physically, mentally and emotionally. You can never completely share a "reality" with anyone, because everything we see, observe, hear or experience is filtered through us. And because of this fact, is coloured by our expectation and our total life experience up to that point. Which will always add subtle overtones to our view.
For example, if two people are asked to view and describe the same room, one, if having been bought up in a large house with spacious rooms, will view the room as small, while another having been used to small cosy cottage rooms will view the same room as a large room, who is correct? which is "reality."
One person could hear the sound of a marching band and be reminded of dear old uncle Harold, who played the bass drum in one for thirty years, and all the fun and ice creams a visit to hear him entailed. Whilst another could think of a wartime friend who died tragically, trombone still at his lips, do you get my point?
You could spend 24 hours a day with someone, share your life, a life you had "built" together. But still that person would always be looking at you, while you would always be looking at them, even if you were looking at the same object, you would never be observing it from exactly the same space, at exactly the same time.
Reality is personal, one person loves dogs and has always had one as best friend, another is frightened by dogs, terrified, feeling that they will harm him. They come across a stray dog in the street, what is the reality of the situation? is there one? the men, the dog, or us, as observers will all see the situation differently.
People tend to feel, that if other people do not experience or see things in the same way that they do, that in some way the other person is judging their experience as wrong. Or that if their personal experience of "reality" is correct...then other views of "reality" must be wrong.
So believing in "one reality" can cause disruptions, friction, hurt feelings and frequently causes wars.
For if you believe that there is only one reality...and all your beliefs and life experiences have backed up that you are right. Then obviously it must be very difficult to understand that the other person feels exactly the same as you do, because all of their beliefs and life experiences have led them to their conclusion in exactly the same way.
In each of these "Realities" each person is correct.
The familiar cry is "we can't both be right".
Understand the concept of realities and you will see "yes we can".
Copyright © SB 2004-2009